We should fast in secret, but that doesn\'t mean not fasting. If you\'re given nonfasting foods by a host, you eat it. That doesn\'t mean that if you go to a BBQ at your friend\'s house, you eat a hamburger just because it was offered at the party. If you\'re at a cookout and you fill a burger bun with tomatoes and lettuce and pickles, most people won\'t notice that you\'re not eating the meat. If they do, you can always say that you\'re trying to eat healthier by reducing your meat and increasing your veggies (they don\'t have to know that it\'s for your spiritual health). In most cases, you can do something similar without drawing attention to yourself. With so many food allergies and preferences and the rise of vegetarianism, it\'s usually not even commented on in my experience.
Of course, if as the original poster, you would be offending your brothers by not eating, then, out of love, you eat.
Still, it is good to consult your spiritual father. Especially for those of you who are beginning your first Lent: talk to your priest! You wouldn\'t expect to go to the gym and perform like an Olympian if you\'d been sedentary your entire life. You would hire a trainer or a coach and listen to him. Don\'t expect that you can design your own fasting discipline and be successful either.
And I wholeheartedly agree with MariaM. Don\'t be legalistic or rigid. The fast is for your benefit and should be approached with love and joy.
In Christ,
Kim
